Not in the Money

Dear Alisa and Gina,

I have a friend who worries about money a lot. These days it’s hard to get together without the conversation turning to the economy and her fears. I understand why – but her fear is really becoming… well boring. And it’s exhausting as well.  I don’t want to snap at her, I’d like to be a good friend but I’m not sure how to speak up. What do you think? ~ Weary

These are volatile times. Many people don’t have a clue how to face the level of uncertainty that we have. And some people don’t like to call attention to what’s good in their lives; maybe they’re fearful of getting the “gods” angry. Your friend might profit from hearing another approach to the turmoil she’s feeling. I agree with you that being around scared and negative people can have a crippling effect on your own energy. Worry doesn’t help you plan for or manage whatever comes next. What helps is being connected to other people, having energy and hope. ~ Alisa

I think your friend needs something good to look forward to. So give her a jar that’s covered with paper or fabric so she can’t see inside. Tell her that every time she feels worried she has to put a dollar in it. The catch is she can’t open it for a year. At the end of the year she gets to open the jar and do something fun with the money. If she worries as much as you say, she’s going to Disneyland! ~ Gina