Minding his Manners

Dear Alisa and Gina,

I’ve been dating someone and it’s getting kind of serious. However his table manners aren’t great and I can see where he gets it from - his family’s are even worse. I would like to correct him, but I don’t want to insult him. Should I say something? ~ Grossed Out

P.S. We’re both in our 40s - so it’s not like he’s a kid.

It sounds like this is really important to you - and if it is you need to bring it up sooner rather than later. Think through what about it is important you - is it embarrassing? Disgusting? Do you think this reflects on you - or can you separate from it? Then take action. Or don’t. ~ Alisa

Pick your battles. A napkin left on the table is no biggie - but a mouth full of food while talking is. If he’s doing something really offensive, remind him vs. teach him - implying that he already knows what’s right. Otherwise let it go. ~ Gina