Reckless on the Road

Dear Alisa and Gina,

Recently my mother-in-law lost her driver's license. (She was found by a policeman on the wrong side of the road.) She is suing the department of motor vehicles and has threatened to drive without her license. I understand her desire to remain independent, but her way of handling the situation has provoked a lot of conflict and pain for her children, especially my husband. Her sons handle the situation by looking the other way. But I’m afraid she’s going to hurt someone, or herself. Should I say something to her?

Worried DIL

I say no. This is an issue between your husband and his mother (and maybe his siblings). Simply support him by listening to his concerns. Only say something to your mother-in-law if she asks for your opinion. Explain to her that it may be useful for her to consider the other issues besides her independence such as the concerns of her children. ~ Alisa

I agree with Alisa. Short of physical restraint you may not be able to keep your mother-in-law from driving. (Make sure you don't let your kids ride in her car.) Call the local police department and ask them for information - they may have some tips for you. And suggest to your husband that he call your mother's doctor, he or she may also have some suggestions. ~ Gina